Sexy Questions
by jaik34
Summary: Tamaki has a song in his heart. Enjoy my 2 AM boredom. Sort of a Song-fic. I don't own the song, nor do I own OHSHC.


This is a random one-shot. Enjoy. ^_^

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

It was like any other day in the Host Club. Tamaki was flirting with random girls. Kaoru was laughing at Hikaru for something he did when he was six. Haruhi was talking to Renge about girl stuff. Hunny was being utterly adorable, and Mori watched. And Kyoya… well, he was being Kyoya. Yes, Music Room #3 was alive with laughter and chatter, even if it was supposedly abandoned.

Suddenly, Tamaki called out," Attention host club members, random girls and Renge!"

"You mean, after all this time, I'M STILL NOT CONSIDERED A HOST CLUB MEMBER?!?!" Renge demanded.

"No, you are not. I like to tell you a beautiful song I heard about on this brilliant website called Youtube. After listening to this awesome song, I couldn't get it out of my head. It has been in my heart and mind for the past week or so, and I can no longer contain it. So I would like to sing it to you all, right now! But, I should warn you, this song contains rhetorical questions… you know, questions you're not supposed to answer. So, without further ado, here is my song!" Tamaki finished dramatically.

During Tamaki's rant-speech, Kyoya pulled out a video camera. (Tamaki bought it so he would feel closer to the commoners, namely Haruhi.) If he managed to get decent film of Tamaki singing, he'll make hundreds, maybe _thousands_ of yen. He pressed the record button. This was going to be good.

Tamaki cleared his voice and sang,

"Sexy questions,

Sexy questions,

Sexy questions!"

He pointed to Hunny.

"Do you own an antelope?" Tamaki asked, as if this was the most important thing in the world.

_Oh yeah, this is totally sexy,_ Haruhi thought sarcastically to herself.

"Nope, can't say that I have," Hunny answered.

"I thought I told you this was a rhetorical question," Tamaki said with a deadly expression. "You're not supposed to answer it."

Hunny sweatdropped. "Oh. I'm sorry."

Continuing his song, Tamaki sang,

"Sexy questions,

Sexy questions,

SEXY QUESTIONS!!"

This time he pointed to Kyoya.

"Hello, how are you?" he asked pleasantly, as if he was talking about the weather.

He didn't say anything.

"Why didn't you answer?" he asked.

"I'm recording this, so shut up and sing."

"Sexy questions,

Sexy questions,

Sexy questions!"

It was Mori's turn.

"How many times have you.. um… walked into… in some snow and made a foot print?"

Mori's expression was a little like this: O_O

Mori knew Tamaki was a performer, but this was a bit… weird. Then again, this wasn't a first. Not only was he a little freaked out, but he was a little surprised too. Out of all the people, he decided to choose him. He felt honored. So he gave Tamaki an honest, serious answer.

"I have made a footprint one thousand, eight hundred and seventy two times."

Tamaki blinked.

This time, when he sang, he added a dance to it. He resembled a broken clock.

"Sexy questions,

Sexy questions,

Sexy questions!!"

Hikaru and Kaoru.

"Did you purchase your sweater vest for 4995 yen?"

"What kind of retarded question is that?" they asked at the same time.

"We don't own sweater vests," Kaoru said.

"And even if we did, we wouldn't pay that much for it," Hikaru finished.

"SEXY QUESTIONS,

SEXY QUESTIONS,

SEXY QUESTIONS,

OOOOOOHHH YYEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!"

The girls screamed and applauded happily. Hearing Tamaki sing was like a blessing onto their souls.

The host club sighed. They have become way too used to this.

Kyoya was already making copies and figuring out a price for the tape.

Tamaki bowed and said, "Thank you, thank you! You have been a wonderful audience! Now, Host Club members, let's get back on task now. Chop, chop!"

And soon enough, everything was back to normal. Tamaki was being a womanizer. Hikaru and Kaoru were thinking of a plan to prank Mori. Renge was drooling over Haruhi. Haruhi was talking to some girls. Hunny was eating cake. Mori stared out the window, wondering what just happened. And Kyoya… well, he was being Kyoya.


End file.
